"If a cat jumps on a hot stove, he will never jump on a hot stove again. And that’s good. But he will also never jump on a cold stove again—and that may not be so good. When something happens and we assign a particular meaning, that kind of “learning reduces the likelihood of repeating things that didn’t work as you hope it will, but that means you know less about the domains where you’ve done poorly than about the domains where you’ve done well.”*
In recognizing that past, present, and future are an interpretation and not intrinsic to reality, a more fluid, open-ended, and relative world becomes available. We are never stuck with the way we are or how we see things. Transformation has the power to unseat us from business as usual, to upset the status quo—it carries with it a wisdom and a knowing that we have a choice about who we are and the full range available to us in being human. Ambiguity and paradox can be valuable, exciting, catalytic—allowing us to engage in worlds that are nuanced, rich, and full of wonder." Landmark Insights
This morning I came across this quote and I was inspired to write a little bit about how, for me, it relates to horsemanship. First off, of late with my students and myself I have been noticing a common theme of indecision, and upset, when it relates to "Was that the right strategy?" "Should I be doing this?" "Should I be doing something different?" We often get so wrapped up in wondering whether we have made the right choice in a split second decision with our horses, that we forget that there is really only one thing to notice ..... Did it work? ;)
One of my favorite sayings of Pats is "rub 'em or smack 'em, you've got a 50/50 chance!" Although we all know this grossly oversimplifies horsemanship it can also be hugely powerful when humans get stuck in paralysis of analysis.
This morning I was playing with a young LBE that I am re-starting. He is classic LBE except for that he has some negative memories about the saddle and this morning I learned also just about accepting the human as a passenger. So I spent the morning playing with him really relaxing and feeling comfortable and confident in carrying me.
First I lay over him and just waited until he could begin breathing, repeated both sides, then did the same straddling him. Being innately LBE he learns really fast even through his unconfidence about riding. So then we moved on to play with finding relaxation in the walk, I got off lots to reward his tries at relaxing, and this all went really smoothly.
Things got exciting when we headed for the trot. You can feel that lots of people have MADE him trot, and as soon as I started asking I could feel his whole body bunch up to say "no!" And.... "I can't!" At the same time. So, going back to the reference I made at the beginning of this blog, I picked the "rub 'em" strategy and just went really slow, asking for a small try and then releasing and waiting for him to relax. Then rinse and repeat. We were making progress towards the trot slowly. As time was going by, as a horse trainer I kept reassessing my strategy to decide whether or not it was working. After about ten minutes I got to the point where I THOUGHT that his LB nature had kicked back in and I was getting more "I won't" rather than "I can't" about the trot, so, time to switch strategies.
We walked along I picked up my intention, slowly began to squeeze softly and ask for the trot, smooch and then a spank! Wah-lah! Three steps of trot.... Stop and rub him.
Now the goal was to get some soft steps of trot without having to spank, and at this point I was feeling quite confident...(yes, perhaps even a bit cocky....). Picked up my intention, and off we went again at the walk. I got a couple more good tries and then he started to slow and be less responsive again. I thought "aha! I know how to fix this." And again, squeeze, smooch and spank....
And bam! Up in the air we went! Three or four little bucks, me hanging on, and trying to get him bent.... All together probably only three moments of excitement and we landed and bent. Hmmm! As I stood there and let my adrenaline come down, rubbed him lots and apologized for picking the wrong strategy!
Horses can switch in a moment from "I won't" to "I can't" and vice versa ... just because something worked one time, doesn't mean it will work another time. When you are playing with your horse and developing them through the levels ... I try to stay focused on two things. First of all, I judge my actions on my results. If my horse is getting calmer, smarter, braver and more athletic then Im probably on the right track. Second, I remember not to make rules, or to discount strategies from the past... File them all away, and remember that one day they may be perfect for you and your horse ... This is a great thing to remember for clinics! Sometimes the strategy that a clinician gives you is not right for you and your horse in that moment, but if you can remember it... store it away, you'd be surprised when one day you chose to "jump on the COLD stove" and it works perfectly, opening up a whole new realm of possibility!
As always, Thanks for listening ;).
Horses can switch in a moment from "I won't" to "I can't" and vice versa ... just because something worked one time, doesn't mean it will work another time. When you are playing with your horse and developing them through the levels ... I try to stay focused on two things. First of all, I judge my actions on my results. If my horse is getting calmer, smarter, braver and more athletic then Im probably on the right track. Second, I remember not to make rules, or to discount strategies from the past... File them all away, and remember that one day they may be perfect for you and your horse ... This is a great thing to remember for clinics! Sometimes the strategy that a clinician gives you is not right for you and your horse in that moment, but if you can remember it... store it away, you'd be surprised when one day you chose to "jump on the COLD stove" and it works perfectly, opening up a whole new realm of possibility!
As always, Thanks for listening ;).
